Just realised.

Salam. Hi there. Im just realised that i tend to speak in english whenever i feel sad, depressed or not in a good mood. I dont know, but im comfortable to use it. I still dont know which word is suitable to replace the word comfortable. But, nevermind. It doesnt mean im berlagak poyo or what, but it just make me feels like that. Plus, i can also improve my english level. Today, i dont know why i feel hopeless, messed up, sad and useless. Mybe, im still cant stand to do works under pressure. Just to let you know, i did nothing for tonight. Sigh. I supposed to finish revise another slide for econs, but im just wasting my time scrolling ig and twittah. Im just really happy whenever i  can talk to someone that can give back my smile. When i say talk, doesnt mean i shared my problems but just having some chit chat and laughing can cheer me up. Thanks to the person that im comfortable enough to crack jokes with you and willing to entertain me which always says nonsense things. And i think if no one talk to me toninght, i will just cry and sleep. Goodnight!

Allah test me.

Salam. I think such a long time i didnt write or post anything here. Today i really terkilan or maybe sad. Because of my careless and maybe hm i dont know. I lost rm100, money given by my brother. Anddd i really think that because of Allah already set that the money is not for me. Yeah, it just with me but then i could not use it. Of coz terkilan. At first the money was in my jean's pocket. But then in class i transfer it into the purse. You know what, i just put it without secure it. Im never put the big value money in such place, but yeah i dont know as i really feel im in mess but i still dont put the money in proper place. Andd it doesnt mean  to belongs to me 😫. So i lost it. Sedih because im not having a lot of money now to buy something nice for eid. Allah knows best and He surely got something better for me. Thats console me a lot. :) as everythinggggg are from Him. Somebody out there really poor than me, and Allah tested with bigger test  but they are still can be happy and grateful , so why im really depressed?  So, never be sad. InnaAllah hama ana.
😊

Hello there.

Assalamualaikum. This is new blog and new me, maybe. Haa takde la new me sangat as i think i'm still the same. Tapi berusaha untuk berubah menjadi yang lebih baik. Ting! Ni hanya permulaan as i'm already 21 years old. Makin tua you know dan perangai masih seperti teen. Act like your age and behave yourself okey. That's all.

How my life begins at university.

 

Assalamualaikum. I’m already got the result and guess what? 2 failed. Andddddd I don’t know what I feel at that time. Feelingless maybe. Of course gpa drop like a bomb and hit me like crazy. When I checked, I just ignore it and when I’m about to sleep all the things across my mind. Aku tak tahu apa yang aku belajar time tu. Rasa macam semuanya useless. Tak kuat nya aku time tu. Sad and can’t think anything untuk pujuk diri. Esok nya lagi la, time tu pergi bank tabung haji sebab mak nak kelurkan duit. Mak nak kelurkan 400 je, aku tulis jadi 4000.the heck! Kena masukkan balik, dah la kena amek number semua, nasib la ayah sabar je time tu. Hari tu jugak ramai pulak makcik pakcik mintak tolong aku fill in boring transaction. Harap semuanya betul la apa yang aku isi. Seriously I can’t think properly. At home, I think and reflect back about myself and slowly try to accept what had I got. REDHA. Not everyone can accept it, including me. Sabar nya orang tu adalah sewaktu ditimpa dugaan. Saat tu jugak dia redha dan terima apa yang Allah beri. Tapi aku? Payah nya. Hak Allah dah sepenuhnya aku tunaikan? Usaha aku adakah sehabis mungkin? Not at all. Aku lalai. Yang tu merupakan faktor utama aku gagal. Yes I’m failed to plan, thus get such result. What you expect to get if you just focus in class and do not do any exercise? You are not a genius person. Everything is all about efforts. Malas dan rajin yang membezakan. Bila dah kena repeat, banyak benda yang berubah. Firstly, of course result. Obviously you MUST got high gpa for next sem. DEAN LIST at least. Yeah, I’m looking for it. That’s my target for this sem to increase my cgpa. Don’t look others. They already have theirs. Like now, I’m the only one that need to repeat the subject. Not only one, but two. What do you expect? Need to have 19.5 credit hours, need to take short sem, no more 3 months holidays, no more excessive sleeps, movie or what so ever. SACRIFICE. The fruit of success is sweet is it? So, I have to endure the bitter of sacrifice. Sedarkanlah aku ya Allah saat aku terleka  dan terlalai. Aku tak layak untuk jadi contoh, just don’t look high to me. And tomorrow morning I will go to kl. Just a short holidays I think. And I’m not in mood at all because of the result. Give me strength Allah. There is a reason behind everything. Jagalah Allah, Allah jaga kamu.

                                                                                                                                          23:48, 29JAN15

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